Marriage – A New Outlook

I am to share my personal thoughts about the marriage since I consider it as an evolutionary journey and today, I thought something new about it…

The meaning of the divine bond called ‘marriage’ should not be confined to only as series of rituals and obligations to fulfill.

The true marriage lies in the bonding of hearts of two people.  While many people may relate marriage with developing a dependency on the spouse, it is exactly the other way round.  Marriage is about developing a bond of trust with your partner so strong that you can actually give him/her a sense of freedom, a sense of mutual understanding and get the same in return. It is all about sharing everything the way it is and finding the solutions of all problems together.

Of course, dependency comes with attachment, the patience soon transforms into complaints, and love decays over time but this is where wisdom comes into picture. Wisdom means looking at your spouse from a fresh perspective every day with a clear memory. Instead of creating a static image of each other, there should be willingness to forget the past and rely on the present moment. Each day should bring out a new discovery about the each other, which makes the journey interesting and free of dependency or expectations.

I have heard a lot of couples fighting over issues like, “On last anniversary, you promised for a movie outing, but you were busy the whole day’.

Think above this normal parlance of married couples.

Is there a point in making promises? Just do what you want to or can do as per the situation and give your spouse the same freedom. There is no need to render the other person expecting the promises to be fulfilled (which happens rarely anyway!).

Only if one gets rid of the shackles of a stale memory, married life can be made very interesting, full of fun and freedom.

Have you ever reasoned why going for a holiday gives a feeling of rejuvenation and helps couples forget their conflicts at home? It happens because the memory which was earlier full of bad experiences gets temporarily replaced with fresh and happy moments.

Now think what if the memory can get replaced on daily basis?

We would look at each other as a new person with a unique set of so many qualities and skills, so much so that we can adjust with the minor differences so easily because qualities weigh much more.

These differences are nothing but deviation in thought or opinion of a person from the referral point of what according to us is ‘perfect’ or ‘right’.

True, responsibilities increase manifolds after marriage, but for the same reason, it is an important phase of evolution or growth, where one learns to keep his self image intact while coping with the family and social needs.

The support of a spouse matters the most during every difficult time throughout the life but sadly, many people realize this truth only at the fag end of their life.

The love of your spouse can make you feel powerful and confident every time. The only thing that’s needed for all that is to give an environment to each other to open up and share. There can be embarrassing times, or moments of inferiority, but the honesty will strengthen the bond forever.